Definition
practical dreamer (prak-ti-cul dree-mur) adj.—1) a person whose big dreams inspire even bigger to-do (and can’t-do) lists, often culminating in a stalemate between the right and left hemispheres of the brain.
First off, let’s confirm your practical dreamerness:
- The risk of appearing stupid is petrifying. And yet you’re sure that even Michaelangelo didn’t create his David without a few clay bloopers.
- Not knowing “what’s next” three steps ahead, is incomprehensible. And yet you recognize that too much planning spoils the fun and the fireworks.
- Appearing to fall short of the “more” mark is demoralizing. And yet you can see that the “less” mark has its benefits.
- Appearing to waste time, money, resources, or energy is intolerable and yet you are all too aware of the high price tag attached to a hungry soul with unmet ambitions.
If you answered ‘hell yes!’ to at least two of these questions, congratulations, you are a practical dreamer. No, I’m not being facetious. And no, it’s not as bad as it sounds. After all, you value your smarts, dream big AND plan big, are a high achiever, have a low tolerance for unproductiveness, and are results oriented.
Well. . .if you can’t find a balance between the practical side and the dreaming side, it is as bad as it sounds. Unfortunately, the prospect of amounting to nothing is paralyzing. A tidy little self-fulfilling prophecy in which your logical side and your creative style duke it out, preventing you from accomplishing anything at all.
You have a choice. You can play it safe and ponder your ambitions for just a little while longer. . .or you can take the plunge and pursue your finer ambitions, –whether that be life on the stage as a cabaret singer, life on the farm as a free range chicken farmer, or life on the road as a freelance photographer.
Whatever “it” is, it matters. A lot. That’s why you keep thinking about it.
The Coop of Doubt
Practical dreamers—smart, resourceful, sensible people with vivid imaginations—are often shanghaied by the very fact that they’re both practical and dreamy. It’s a blessing and a conundrum, this combination. Each aspect has benefits that help and limitations that hinder. Each satisfies one set of vital needs, albeit sometimes at the expense of the other.
But the practical side has a quirk the dreamer side does not—a coop of doubt. Not just the usual doubts, either. A unique breed of crowing, scratching, pecking, roosting, brooding doubts that effectively finagle facts and fears so that your goals seem too impractical and your dreams too foolish. And that the status quo is the sanest, safest place to be…however uninspiring.
How to Fly the Coop in Theory
The solution to the practical-dreamer’s special breed of doubts is not—I repeat, not—to flip flop the emphasis, to tame your practicalities and follow only the power of your imagination. Why? Because that’s NOT true to who you are. Frankly, I doubt that it’s even possible—your head would likely explode.
A solution that involves far less gore is to:
- Engage the spirit and potential of both your pragmatism and your imagination in a coordinated effort.
- Quiet your doubts sufficiently to allow yourself to do something rather than nothing.
- Re-purpose your doubts into – yes, it’s true – a constructive launch pad so you can address the “what if” questions from a position of experience rather than mere speculation.
At the very least, with the left side of your brain, right side of your brain and heart working cooperatively, you can realistically assess your goals (which is a pit-stop on the way to pursuing them outright).
How to Fly the Coop in Reality
Together we can co-create a flight plan out of this coop via some one-on-one coaching conducted by phone. By which we:
- Expose the ins and outs of your particular coop of doubts ( or at least the doubts making the biggest nuisance of themselves). Discover the ‘who, what, when, where, how and why’ of your coop and document these details. Knowledge is power.
- Clarify the bigger picture that exists outside the coop, so that you can move toward a full-spectrum, more positive vision of your life. To focus and persevere, your imagination needs something purposeful to gnaw on.
- Send your pragmatism and imagination to couples counseling. We want these two to collaborate together rather than spar from opposite corners. The relationship you have with each may hold the key to a more productive union of the two, and a whole lot more peace of mind.
- Compile one or two little rituals that help you sustain a balancing point between your practical mind and your dreaming mind. You might, for example, carry with you a symbol that represents harmony between both sides (a symbol that need only makes sense to you). Or, you might create a collage of images that show what’s possible when you stay out of the coop (a collage hung on the fridge next to your 7-year old’s drawing of a class trip to the zoo).
If you’re interested in taking these practical steps toward living your dreams, drop me a line using the contact form in the footer section of this page or at melissa@freshapproachcoach.com to get started. If you’re approaching “interested” but not quite there yet, hang out on the blog for a while or sign up to receive a free tool for creating breakthroughs when you’re feeling stuck.
Living in a coop of doubt is no fun—I’ve been there. And let me tell you, as someone who’s quieted those voices of discord in my head, the dream is so much better IN reality. I tell you this from Spain where I live a stone’s throw from the Mediterranean, travel, and pursue my ambition of helping other people realize theirs.
